I’m trying to figure out where this woman came from. This woman who is willing to try new things. This woman who’s thoughts and ideas only lived in her own head, packed away in a treasure chest behind a wall of fear. Yes. I said it. I admit it. FEAR. Fear of what? Fear of failure and success. Fear of failure after success.
Fear wouldn’t let me dance or sing. Fear wouldn’t let me do anything unless I knew it would have a favorable result. It was almost as if not getting accolades would kill me. There were only two choices for me
Do a great job or do nothing. This often resulted on doing nothing.
There’s a whole world of ideas living vibrant lives inside my head. They are waiting for permission to exist outside of the comfort zone. In the comfort zone there is no chance of failure. Only potential. But….where there is no chance of failure there is also no chance of success.
I think it hit me one day that I would die. With me would die every unrealized dream, unsung song, untold story and unreached goal. The only thing that prevented these things from loving was me. I let fear bully me. Then one day I stood up. I did it. I looked fear in the face and said, “Why not?”.
Without going into great detail, I will say that the results of bringing forth my ” great” ideas was mixed. A lot of cheer but not much support. This was a test for me. How much did I believe in me and my ideas. There was no roaring applause or cheering section. A couple of claps. Claps from hands that sometime had to pick me up after falling flat on my face or administer cpr when I was out there dying. In taking that step and choosing to look fear in the face I leaned that fear only has power if I give it power. It can neither stop nor propel me. Knowing this is Freeing. Life has ups and downs, wins and losses…accepting this is FREEDOM.
(Can’t figure out how to take off the underline. Enjoy)
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